Tuesday, 17 November 2015

A Lost Friendship

Sometimes life is a constant battle with nostalgia of a time that can't be real again! Memories still linger and remind me of our secrets and laughter together. That was a time we were carefree and happy, unaware of the sad twists and turns that destiny had in store for us in the future.

There are bitter sweet memories of us. Walking hand in hand, off to our most cherished place on the basketball court. Sitting and watching our friends play. Learning lifelong lessons, ones that would help us on and off the court. I still think of the times of us sharing and caring, innocently loving, I still think of the times I silently prayed things would last a lifetime. I still treasure the little gifts that we exchanged with our meagre pocket moneys. We dreamed so many dreams for us, of our lives and of changing the world for the better. The dreams have been modified with realities and although life is not exactly as we planned it to be, I hope yours is close enough to your dreams. I hope that life is still keeping your gorgeous smile on your face.

Today, it is not the memories that hurt.. but the realisation that there shall be no more. For in the short time I spent with you, I formed a bond so strong that the threads of it still hold strong to this day. Today I am scared to form others like them, for fearing of losing them again. The pain never subsides. The reasons for why we lost this beautiful friendship is still unknown to me. But I ponder over them no longer.

It has been over a decade that we were as in my memories. Since then life has changed completely for both of us. We are no longer the young girls with dreams in our eyes and fire in our bellies, taking on the world around us. I know not what your life is like. Only what little I hear from others and the social media stalking that I do quietly, to know you are well and happy. Your recent blogs have helped me learn more of your life and I am happy to see you have a beautiful life filled with people who love and care for you, and many more who admire and encourage you. 

I love you, quietly, without anyone's knowledge of how important you still are to me. Even I know not why! Maybe because you made me a better person, and still continue to do. I will always quietly turn to you for guidance, and I will always follow the little things I learnt from you. For it is you who taught me patience and it is you taught me immense compassion. You are the one who taught me to listen and it is from you that I also learnt to speak for myself. Your kind heart and honest words taught me that I did not need to be someone else to be accepted, and you taught me to accept myself. You are a powerful woman today, and for me you will always be. I am proud of you and want to tell you that you will always hold a piece of my heart. I will always say my silent prayers for you!

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